Thursday, March 3, 2011

Where, oh where, have I left my brain?

It's one of those weeks. You know, the times when you are scared to death to say anything because you're quite sure it's not gonna come out right.  It may even come out really, really wrong.  The times when spell check saves you more than ever, and when it doesn't you look like an idiot.  The times you can't connect a thought if it contains more than two sentences.  The times your brain won't work, but then won't quit working so that you can get some sleep (which might help your brain to work).  Yeah, I'm going in circles here, but you get the point.  I'm there.  All the way.
Insomnia, indigestion, incompetence, incontinence (wait, no...not quite there yet) - this is the new me.  Ugh. 
And the next four days threaten to push me to the brink of insanity.  So, if you think about it, say an extra prayer for me this week.  It really is important that I squelch my ADD (and the urge to curl up in a fetal position and eat chocolate) long enough to focus on some very important tasks. 
And speaking of chocolate, is anyone else freaking out about the predicted chocolate shortage?  Yeah, I know it's 20 years out, but I will be like 55 by then and Lord knows, 55-year-old women need chocolate!  Anyway, it seems that the cocoa farmers on the Ivory Coast have decided they need more money for their beans, and some are calling it quits until prices rise. 
Another influencing factor is that more people are developing an affinity for dark chocolate, possibly because it is a healthier option. Dark chocolate requires more cocoa, causing a spike in demand.
Anyway, this situation requires a plan. I'm open for suggestions, but at this point I think I'll slow down on stockpiles of body wash, deodorant, and toilet paper, and instead opt for Butterfinger, Dove Dark, and Hershey Nuggets w/almonds. What's more important anyway? I suppose we could survive without t.p. Hmmmm...
And if you think a bunch of Wisconsin school teachers look like morons with bedhead, bare feet, bad breath, yelling union slogans and accepting bogus doctor's notes, just wait and see what a bunch of deprived chocoholics might do. Hopefully we'll have more class (wouldn't be too hard), but desperate times require desperate measures.
In the meantime, have a great weekend. And yes, have some chocolate...while you can still afford it!


  1. This post made me LOL. I guess your hysterical state is comical to some :) Sorry to laugh at your expense...hope the next few days DO go well for you! And by all means, EAT SOME CHOCOLATE.

  2. No! I hadn't heard about the chocolate shortage! It makes me look forward to Heaven all the more. And that's no joke.

    Right there with you on the brain not working but working all the time when I need to sleep. My brain must have its days and nights mixed up. ;(

  3. I hadn't heard about the predicted chocolate shortage! I am simply devastated. Terrified.

    No question...if I ever have to choose between tp and dark chocolate (yes, I count the points)....It's a no-brainer.

    Let the stockpiling begin!

    This is making me laugh out loud. And I needed a lol this morning pretty bad.


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