My husband's desire for intimacy is not something he
has made up for selfish purposes. It is part of God's
design, and it is a genuine need to be met through
the bond of marriage.
If you've been married less than a year, you may wonder why anyone would actually need to learn this. If you've been married more than a year, well...momma told me there'd be days like this...haha!
Without getting too personal, let me state my case. No matter what the average woman goes through (physically, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually), her "drive" is affected. No matter what a man goes through (well, almost), his "drive" stays in overdrive. Although I do realize that there are situations where the roles seem to be reversed, this is the typical scenario. (If you can't tell, I'm doing my best to override your internet filter:-))
At different points in our marriage, I struggled with frustration (and sometimes even anger) because of my inability to recognize his needs as needs and not simply selfish, superfluous desire. Let me be clear that these frustrations didn't originate through any action of my husband, rather my own inner battles which often occurred during times of hormonal upheaval, stress, worry, or exhaustion (2 kids within 14 mos? Yeah...).
It's easy for a wife to enjoy intimacy when her world is all lined up just right and things are going well, but the real gift that we can give to our husband is to be available to him when we might not just quite feel like it. After all, he didn't program himself. God wired him with needs that, as a Christian man, only his wife can meet.
I'm so thankful to have a husband who is striving for all he's worth to be faithful to his commitment to me. There's so much more to this topic, but it's only a post so I'll see you tomorrow for Day Eleven of 15 Things!